-.-

2011-12-03T02:42:00.000+08:00

没想到我做了那么久的白痴，但我终于也觉悟了

2011-11-23T09:26:00.000+08:00

Grumpy morning

2011-11-20T11:17:00.004+08:00

【那些年，我們一起追的女孩】

那些年，我们都很幼稚，却以为我们已经长大了，能为自己的前途做打算。

那些年，为了应考，我们一起念书到深夜。

那些年，我们一起做过的疯狂的事。

那些年，我们因为没有勇气，对自己没有信心而错过的爱情。

好奇怪，小时候的我们想快点长大，但长大后又想回到年少无知的时候。

好久没有看到一部能让我觉得好贴切的电影了，仿俯让我回到那段求学的时侯。电影里的一些情节也跟一些发生在我身上的事太象似了。这些回忆并重来没有被遗忘过，而是搁在脑海里的某个角落，等着某个触动而引发。这个触动就是这部电影了。

我曾经告诉一个好朋友我们不能活在记忆里，因为这些已经是过去，再也没有办法让它们再重现。与其痛苦地盼望它们再重现，不如好好的憎惜这些美好的记忆，那也许我们会快了一些。

2011-10-16T21:18:00.003+08:00

Who is the best listener?

I pick the diary. You can pour all your emotions into one and it'll never judge you and takes in whatever you have to give.

I'm going to start one, to keep myself sane from all the monotonous issues I'm facing now, as well as all other sort of problems.

Am I on the brink of depression? I guess so. This transition from student to work life is the biggest change I have ever experienced and its still hard for me to cope. Well, at least it's bringing me closer to my family, rare occasion when I HTHT with my brothers.

2011-10-16T18:14:00.001+08:00

2011-10-16T14:01:00.001+08:00

thanks for teaching me one of the most valuable lesson ever

2011-10-11T20:10:00.000+08:00

Please dont be in love with someone else
Please dont have somebody waiting on you

2011-08-09T20:45:00.001+08:00

Death is not as scary compared to the feeling of leaving your loved ones when you passed on

2011-08-03T12:43:00.000+08:00

2011-07-31T22:08:00.001+08:00

Pardon for the poor quality, what matters is the content.

男人是畜牲！

2011-07-30T17:22:00.001+08:00

Ladder theory

2011-05-01T03:23:00.000+08:00

Idol of the moment: Chiam See Tong

2011-04-29T16:21:00.001+08:00

Wah I want to watch!

2011-04-28T20:03:00.001+08:00

Stuck in my head

2011-04-22T22:43:00.001+08:00

Expectations are the cause of disappointments

2011-04-15T22:57:00.003+08:00

Last day of university today. To be more specific, the last day of my academic career. A whole 15 years. To be honest, I get that "I-have-no-idea-what-I'm-going-to-do-next" feeling all over again, a reminiscent of that when I just ORDed. This is a transition more fearful and apprehensive than ever, that I will be expose to the harsh and individualistic working environment filled with office politics, shenanigans and maybe devious ploys, all in the sake of proving one's worth, or a promotion. What awaits? I have no idea, but to pray hard I'll get a job soon, working aside with approachable colleagues.

2011-04-02T18:40:00.000+08:00

天下无不散之宴席

2011-03-26T22:14:00.002+08:00

Gorjess!

2011-03-26T21:28:00.000+08:00

6km run on friday gone down the drain!

2011-03-20T19:41:00.000+08:00

School on a Sunday is not uncommon anymore

2011-03-19T15:23:00.002+08:00

I missed my weekly dosage of sun ray

2011-03-16T22:00:00.002+08:00

Shopping lifts my spirit :)

2011-03-15T21:50:00.003+08:00

One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.
He passed the first interview; the director did the last interview, made the last decision.
The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.
The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?" the youth answered "none." The director asked, “Was it your father who paid for your school fees?" The youth answered, "My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees."
The director asked, “Where did your mother work?" The youth answered, "My mother worked as clothes cleaner."The director requested the youth to show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect. The director asked, “Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?"
The youth answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me." The director said, "I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother's hands, and then see me tomorrow morning." The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the kid. The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.

This was the first time the youth realized that...
1. It was this pair of hands that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee.
2. The bruises in the mother's hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.
After finishing the cleaning of his mother hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother. That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.
_____________________________________________________
Next morning, the youth went to the director's office. The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: “Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?" The youth answered, “I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes."
The Director asked, “please tell me your feelings."

The youth said.....
Number 1, I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not the successful me today.
Number 2, by working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done.
Number 3, I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.

The director said, “This is what I am looking for to be my Manager".
1. I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others,
2. A person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done,
3. And a person who would not put money as his only goal in life.
The director said, “You are hired.”

Later on, this young person worked very hard.....
1. And received the respect of his subordinates.
2. Every employee worked diligently and as a team.
3. The company's performance improved tremendously.
A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would
1. Develop "entitlement mentality" and would always put himself first.
2. He would be ignorant of his parent's efforts.
3. When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager,
4. He would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others.

For this kind of people, who may be good academically,
1. May be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement.
2. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more.
If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we destroying the kid instead?

You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, and watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowl together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because...
1. You want to love them in a right way.
2. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are,

One day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person.
The most important thing is your ...
1. Kid learns how to appreciate the effort and
2. Experience the difficulty
3. And learns the ability to work with others to get things done.

Quoted note from Facebook. Exactly the reason why I'm working for.

2011-03-15T21:29:00.001+08:00

2011-03-13T20:53:00.002+08:00

Two pints of beer a week keep the stress away.

2011-03-12T23:30:00.001+08:00

"Nap" at Sentosa

2011-03-10T00:54:00.001+08:00

You're so pretty

2011-03-07T08:27:00.001+08:00

I give up trying to clear my tag board from spam messages. Going to remove it all together.

2011-03-04T18:39:00.002+08:00

Graduating is going to be a milestone, closing of one chapter and yet signifying the beginning of another. I believe it is now relevant to question what in fact am I fighting for. I always believe there's divine intervention when I have to make important decisions, or forces me to make one, other than in the area of relationships and this song so appeared at the right time.

Success is not going to be easy, but at least I know what my goals are.

2011-02-25T04:50:00.000+08:00

Super addictive

2011-01-06T01:44:00.002+08:00

One should take a step back from the usual mundane routine of shuttling between school and home(now) and in the future hectic work life and consider alternative options of contributing to the society, other than in the form of GDP. I did today, by visiting an orphanage. Kids there really gave me a headache while giving them tuition, simply because they have short attention span and not really interested in studying.

And the take home point is that: all of us are more fortunate than these kids, and so it would be good to contribute in whatever way possible.

2010-12-28T20:37:00.001+08:00

2010-12-21T09:01:00.002+08:00

Here's my analysis of my year 3 sem 1 result.
BSP2001 C+
CM3232 B-
CM3242 A-
DSC3201 B+
FIN2004 B+
TR3001 B
Overall CAP: 3.56

Im not grumbling that I got this result since I expected most of them. BSP2001 was a goner ever since mid terms. I really wanted to do well in it but alas it's beyond my ability. I've a feeling mid terms did me in for CM3232 cause I found the final paper manageable but this was a expected grade anyway. I've done above average for both mid terms for CM3242 and the final paper isn't difficult at all. Can't complain when its open notes and he asked definition question. Really got lucky with this module since he's a new prof and probably didn't know how to test. Past year papers for this module were killers. I'm a little disappointed with DSC3201. Thought I could get my first A in my uni life, since I scored the full 20% for my CA and I thought we did a pretty good job for the presentation. The final exams wasn't that tough either. B+ is still a decent grade nonetheless. My disappointment with DSC3201 was replaced with a tinge of surprise for FIN2004 since I expected a B due to the fiercely competitive cohort. Maybe this suggest I should pursue a course in CFA? I shall leave that discussion to another post. And lastly TR3001. I didnt know what to expect for this since its a pure project based module but I think B is a decent grade.

Overall, I pretty satisfied with my results since I achieved my objective of maintaining at CAP above 3.5. And indeed it didn't drop at all. And now one last semester of exams to go.

2010-11-29T23:31:00.003+08:00

Having 2 papers DSC3201 and FIN2004 consecutively in a day (1 in the morning and 1 in the afternoon) is taxing on the body and the mind. Nonetheless I think I should do rather okay for both.

And I'm damn elated now. Finance prof uploaded the exam marking scheme online and I calculated my score. 94/100! Even so, I'm not expecting an A or even a A- for this especially when the finance cohort is so competitive. B would suffice and I think I would no problem attaining this grade!

2010-11-21T23:12:00.002+08:00

I think I made the wrong decision by changing my hair parting to the left.

2010-11-21T00:19:00.002+08:00

Cant help but smile at this although I have no idea what they're talking about. Hitting the sack in a light mood!

2010-11-20T15:01:00.000+08:00

Physical chem is too abstract for my liking

2010-11-19T00:49:00.002+08:00

Third day into macroeconomics. Soon to be the fourth. The professor summarized 4 chapters of the textbook into a mere 30 slides. Hope this day will be the last I'll spend on this.

2010-11-16T21:34:00.001+08:00

Maybe macroeconomics is not that difficult as I thought it'll be after all.

2010-11-14T21:35:00.001+08:00

Exam conditions can be daunting. I redid my finance mid term and discovered I could have achieved at least the mean score too.

2010-11-07T00:56:00.002+08:00

"Education is not for the sake of examination only. Education is to open up the eyes." - Prof LOH K.P. DEAN’S CHAIR PROFESSOR

How many professor out there emphasizes on this? And many of us actually take modules for the sake of learning and experiencing new knowledge? I believe everyone of us at some time is guilty of taking easy modules just to pull up the CAP score.

That aside, although it is not my choice, I've taken numerous business modules now and so far I've enjoyed them more than I did for chem modules even though I did really badly for them. I feel that the final grade is not the sole determinant of whether you've done well for the course or not, but rather whether you've enjoyed the process and picked up something useful to apply in the real life situation. After all, practical applications always, if not, most of the time differs from what is taught within the confines of the classroom. And again I have to emphasize, I really enjoyed this semester for two reasons. First, for the first semester of my tertiary education life I don't have to do lab! Second, theories I learnt in macroeconomics and finance are applied in real life situations. I'm glad I'm able to understand what is reported in the news. Although I might have to prepare myself for a shock when exam results are released.

"If you get a bad grade, it doesn't mean you are dumb. It just means that there are smarter people around." - Yin Foong

2010-11-03T20:47:00.002+08:00

Hitting the sack early tonight since I was rudely woken up by my neighbours who were drilling holes early in the morning. Totally cant focus on my work now so might as well.

2010-11-01T01:07:00.005+08:00

Jessica is totally gorgeous in this performance.

2010-10-27T20:38:00.002+08:00

Everyone has a limit to their patience and I finally learnt my driving instructor's today. 4 engine stalls today. It was the first time I managed to stall the engine this many times. Not an achievement to boast about though. And I hate the feeling I get when someone gets pissed because of me.

2010-10-23T00:12:00.001+08:00

If I fail my TP, its most likely that I didnt check the mirrors enough.

2010-10-20T22:27:00.002+08:00

I'm getting tired of this week. Deadlines and tests.

To digress, and take my mind off revision, albeit for 10 minutes or so, I had my first official PA meeting. Unlike SOW meetings which we meet we discuss the planning of the camp, these meetings are more of a 'teaching' session. There are several things we have to take note, down to the things we can or cannot say. Its not called an expedition for nothing.

2010-10-20T19:58:00.002+08:00

Sinking feeling that this sem wouldnt turn out to be that well after all.

2010-10-17T13:49:00.002+08:00

Listening to macroecons lecture is torturous.

On a side note, its week 10. 4 more weeks to finals.

2010-10-09T01:35:00.000+08:00

Project Angel XIII here I come

2010-10-08T23:28:00.001+08:00

Pls bold or color the part that you think it's true about you.

LIBRA MAN

A man who has no balance like his Zodiac symbol. He is not the gentle, cool , calm and charming guy like what you see. He has another dark side of aggression, stubborn and he likes to start an argument the most. Sometimes he can be so depress and unstable. Up and down like he is trying to balance himself most of the time.

To many people, he is a friendly guy and always smile even when he is mad or up set. His voice always gentle and calm. he always set and comb his hair as if he comes out from a shampoo advertisement. Mostly Libra men are good looking, even the ugly one is charming. When he smiles, it is so bright that the whole world is smiling with him too.

When he is in a balance mood, he is the type of person you want to be with. In other unbalancing mood, he likes to make people argue about something and watching it with fascination and fun. He will wait to be the one who compromise and clear thing up. He likes to be in a conflicting conversation.

Libra man is lazy by nature. After his tired day at work, he likes to sit still and just look out of the window or read quietly. He likes to be in his own world. After recharging his battery, he will be very energetic again and may even take you out that night.

Libra man normally will not do any shocking or abnormal things to be noticed. He likes to be conformed with his crowd, but if you watch him carefully, you will see the different. If he wear a shirt, it will have to be a zipper front instead of buttons, or a special tie bar. There is always something in him that he will not allow totally conformity to take him over.

A straight forward , no non-sense guy. He is careful and delicate in details. He will spent extra time to doing it right, than comes back to correct them later. He hates people who boost, or exaggerate. He does not like over dressed woman or make herself a center of an attention.

He loves to read. He loves poems and loves art. When he works he can work like crazy, but after work he can turn on romantic jazzy music and treat you so gently. He loves to give people advice and normally give a good advice. If you fall for him, you will stay like being trapped in a spider web. If you want to break up with him, he will persuade you a zillion ways to stay and you can not stop him anyway. After he persuade you to stay, or after a big fight, he will be so sweet to you as if he has never hurt your feeling before ever.

He will has his own way to win a girl love and affection. Once she says yes, he will lay back and wonder if he should go on or if he should back out. In his teen, he changed many girl friends because he can not clearly separate loving a friend and loving a girl friend. He will check and re-cheek if his match is suitable and compatible with him.

Even he is a romantic man, he can hardly understand the emotion of the one he loves. He is a generous guy even he sets his life so systematically. He never knows when he makes you unhappy. He never knows how he up set you. He will never knows what he said wrong. If he is your lover, be prepare for this.

A not so pretty girl with no brain is not his type of woman. If you are not pretty enough, he will not mind talking to you but he does not care to get to know you. Any girls, pretty or ugly can ask for his help, he will be happy to help. He hates to argue by yelling at each other, so you tend to see he argue with his girl friend seriously but try at best to be very quiet.

He likes to have a girl friend by getting to know each other like a friend first. If you want him, you have to like the same thing he does. He prefers a pretty and gentle woman than a smart and ugly woman. You have to understand his mood especially he can has many different moods. He is a private person, so when he needs to be alone better let him be.

2010-10-05T18:52:00.001+08:00

First driving lesson.

Dont know if I pissed the instructor off cause I only told him I was a rover driver during NS only at the end of the lesson.

2010-10-01T20:25:00.002+08:00

Damn fucking emo and pissed now.

How am I able to fulfill my obligations when I cant even do my mid terms well?

2010-09-28T23:47:00.001+08:00

Its yet another poignant post again.

Its my birthday today! YayyyYYY!!

Its always easy to label birthday as a joyous occasion. That no doubt, applies to me too, but to me, looking at it from another perspective, is a 'special' day. How so? On this very day, 23 years ago, my mum endured excruciating pain to bring me into this world, after 9 months of gestation. Although advances in medical technology has made it relatively safer to deliver, there's is still a certain level of risk involved. So in fact, I think this day is much more special than Mother's day. Its not just my day alone, its my mum's too.

Referring to my video post below:
Dear mom,
I'll do my best to fulfill my responsibilities.

2010-09-24T12:26:00.002+08:00

I teared a little when watching this

2010-09-21T20:54:00.004+08:00

Prank on Terence by Zhi Wei and I really brighten up the mundane mugging session at the library today :D

On a side note, I have to comment at this juncture, the midpoint of the semester, that I'm really glad all my modules are going well, the exception of CM3232. I didnt really do very well for that mid term, but nevertheless to console myself, it was somehow of a misinterpretation of the question. CM3242 was quite easy so far, since the lecturer is new and he doesnt really know what to teach, or test. But again there's always the bell curve lurking to moderate your grades downwards.

My project group mates for TR3001 and DSC3201 has been incredibly cooperative and productive. Finally I've met awesome group members! FIN2004 is crammed with interest rates, investments and anything related to the $ sign but nonetheless I'm enjoying it. And BSP2001! I'm the only guy in my tutorial class! Not that I like the attention but I enjoyed working with the girls in my presentation group and I feel that I've understood the economy a little more.

I always loathe studying ever since I commence tertiary education, yet I feel this semester is not that bad thus far, and time passed really quickly for some reason. Maybe, the fact that this would be my last year in NUS made it less tiresome. Or I've gotten accustomed to the stress level that I no longer fret over it. I'm so close to graduating and embark to fulfill some of my personal goals!

And lastly, I've signed up for Project Angel. Solo. The decision is still not final though.

2010-09-17T20:46:00.001+08:00

Are we human? Are we dancer?

Living for what we believe in? Or mere puppets?

2010-09-17T07:36:00.001+08:00

Damn beautiful song from one of my favourite SNSD member

2010-09-16T20:23:00.003+08:00

Its best not to be 嘴硬 and say this or that wont happen cause nothing is absolute. Especially when affairs of the heart are concerned. To think I've fallen prey to that.

2010-09-14T12:45:00.001+08:00

Sleepless nights

2010-09-12T23:46:00.001+08:00

What is this feeling I'm getting?

2010-09-11T17:44:00.001+08:00

Looking back at past 23 years(17 days short), I have alot of things that I never did, and can never do again.

Regrets.

2010-09-11T03:00:00.001+08:00

You wont regret as much what you have done as compared to what you didnt do. How apt.

2010-09-10T11:55:00.001+08:00

Im so glad I took Management as a second major. Tough as it is, I've learnt more about how economy and finance sector functions.

2010-09-01T17:02:00.001+08:00

So many new stunts in BMT: First paint ball and now letters from family.

2010-08-30T23:34:00.002+08:00

Taeyang & Dara - perfect couple!

2010-08-30T22:42:00.002+08:00

So I read some of my posts in the past and thought that I was really a angsty kid, especially during NS. The present me cant stand all the whining and complaining that I did. I guess its really good to keep a blog/diary so you have a reference to compare how much you have matured in your thinking.

2010-08-29T23:12:00.002+08:00

I want to watch!

2010-08-29T21:44:00.002+08:00

HTHT sessions at the SCAPE rooftop has become a regular conclusion to almost every SOW outing. I do enjoy every aspect of it: the cooling breeze, the company, the option to stargaze (It is surprising to be able to spot stars even with the amount of light pollution the Singapore street lamps poses.)

2010-08-26T22:17:00.001+08:00

Is this going to be another 7 years curse again? I dont have many 7 years to spare.

2010-08-10T23:00:00.001+08:00

Its about time I step out of my comfort zone.

NOC, I shall attempt to conquer you.

2010-08-08T22:58:00.002+08:00

The culmination of SOW has certainly run emotions high, especially after the screening of Wendy’s video and Glenn’s speech. I believe the experience we shared, the new friendships forged, the fun we had, could be not be easily surmise into a few paragraphs. And yet I do think I should pen my thoughts down to express my gratitude and feelings, especially when it is still fresh in my mind.

I still remembered when we had the first meeting. Awkward silences, reluctance to contribute ideas and blank stares in space. And how quickly it changed over months – members conversing excitedly among themselves, always suggesting a barrage of ideas that we could not come to an agreement, playful glitter in the eyes as they start to gossip or devise shenanigans to be played. ‘Scandals’ among committee members became common, yet they act as a double edge sword. It was frustrating for the targeted members, yet others glee in joy as they watch their continual denials. But ultimately everyone came out cool; as it was all in the name of fun and it really gel everyone together.

I still remembered when we had our first beach games tryout. Reluctance to participate, no initiative and playing among themselves instead of concentrating on the games. And how it changed over months – avid participations in countless pre-prep camps and activities, displayed enthusiasm to help out wherever aid is needed, cooperated with one another so the activity can be completed quickly. Criticism from MC members during the first games tryout was harsh, since this committee was entirely new. Obstacles were inevitable – venues where games to be carried out were unavailable due to bookings from other faculties and SYOG. Yet we were able to improvise and mature through the months of arduous planning, and we are what we are today.

Glenn once asked us what our objectives for the camp were. I replied: “I think there are three layers (actually I think I meant platforms) which must be satisfied before we can declare SOW to be successful. They were firstly, the freshies to create memories which they are able to keep, secondly, the seniors to enjoy themselves since they were crucial to the success of the camp and lastly, the committee to stick together even after the camp has ended.” In retrospect, I believe we have achieved all three levels, evident from the numerous posts on Facebook on how they had enjoyed the camp. I was certainly contented and thrilled!

Each of us have grown and matured in their own ways over the nine months. It has been a wonderful journey where everyone had fun. All good things come to an end, it is understood that there must be an end to the SOW committee 09/10. Yet this doesn’t mean the friendship and relationship we constructed over months should go to naught. Although some of us have plans to go overseas for exchange and participate in the NOC programme, let us all keep in contact and maintain this friendship forever. To my dearest SOW committee 09/10, love ya all lots!

2010-07-27T01:46:00.000+08:00

Its finally here. Day 0 of SOW which we have painstaking devoted much effort into for the past 8 months or so. To be honest, Im quite proud of the items we have come up for the freshmen. Lots of new programme lined up that werent in previous SOWs, at least the past two years.

And to finally post my long overdue sentiments regarding the prep camp. The lack of sleep got the better of me, coupled with the fact that I have a extremely short fuse and the inability to contain my anger, I blew my top not only once, but twice. It was awkward later when I cooled down after a short while, embarrassed at the string of expletives i spewed at the spur of moment. Come to think of it, it was really a childish way of managing anger. I believe the crux of the problem was my poor communication skills. Im a poor team player, evident from my poor project work grade, and even now during university in which I have never done well in a group project before. Nevertheless, I hope to eventually change after constant exposure to such group projects and SOW.

2010-07-24T21:22:00.001+08:00

Super Junior - No Other

2010-06-30T16:56:00.001+08:00

No point crying over spilled milk

2010-06-25T07:55:00.001+08:00

Rarely awake at such a time. Its because I have been out the whole of last night. Had quite a nice talk with buddies and new found friends.

And I think I have rheumatism in my left wrist. I cant remember which wrist I fractured but my left wrist hurts quite a bit whenever the weather is cold.

2010-06-22T02:04:00.002+08:00

Recently, I have several encounters in which Christianity becomes the stumbling block in the progression of one's relationship. Im not writing this post to bash the religion, but only to share my views. Although Im not a Christian myself, I've spent two years in a Methodist school to know some very basic commitment worshipers have to abide by.

Christians are bounded by the commitment that their other half must be a Christian as well, otherwise they resign themselves to the fate that non believers suffer. How strictly they adhere to those commitments very well depend on how devoted they are. I believe most of us know what that fate is, so I wont state it explicitly. Yet, I cant fathom their thoughts, or their reasoning, but is this worthwhile to make the exchange? It is not easy to meet someone you can share your joy and woes with and to forsake such an relationship would seem wasteful. How sure can one be that there will be another such an person appearing?

Im in no position to judge.

2010-06-15T23:51:00.000+08:00

I demand my fringe to grow at a faster rate now

2010-06-11T23:30:00.002+08:00

So, the first ICT came to a conclusion, and without fail, not without shenanigans from the rifle companies. Their blunders can be so blatant that makes you question their commitment. Not that we are committed, but at least we dont leave controlled equipment around which their unaccountability would definitely warrant a stay in the detention barracks.

The purpose of the ICT was "back to basics", and the training programs adhered to that, reminding us the times we had during signals institute. Of course, the stark difference was the intensity and the work we have to do. The lessons conducted by the trainer was filled with laughter, mainly because the trainer was fond of cracking jokes and making sexual connotations with reference to signal set parts and of course having uncle-nephew relationship with one of our platoon mate, continually verbal harassing him.

What caught my attention, was the trainer's attempt to "convert" us to their thinking. In my opinion, brainwashing doesnt have any significant effect on us, since we already harbour intense hatred for the system. Yet, I found this couple of lines profounding: "All of you are military personnel, and just T-Loan to the civilian world to raise our GDP. Otherwise, why do you have to report to camp when activated?" I wanted to argue that, but knowing it would be fruitless (since he holds a higher rank and will ultimately have the final say), I didnt do so to prevent unnecessary time wastage.

I would initally dispute the first part of the statement and explain that briefly. We are spending the bulk of our lives out of army camp, and that reporting to camp are forced onto us. How are we considered to be military personnel when we are doing it unwillingly?

On the other hand, when I thought about the second sentence, I came to a conclusion. "Family". I believe all of us are more concerned about the civilian life as we are all studying now. We're all frustrated at having an ICT right smack in the middle of our holiday which disrupts all our activities and plans. Yet when we get out to society and pursue our career and ultimately start our own family, the mindset will change inevitably. And this will perhaps be the time when we assume the role of the military personnel. To be honest, I was quite touched when we out-pro and saw this NS-men cuddling and playing with his baby.

To end off, a quote from the trainer again:
"If you are not going to protect your family, who else is going to?"

2010-06-11T20:33:00.001+08:00

I'm backkkkk

2010-06-06T22:00:00.001+08:00

Bye to civilization for a week.

2010-06-06T00:54:00.002+08:00

'Brother' Or _______?

I cant believe you betrayed our trust. Isnt that night suppose to be a all guys night out and we're suppose to keep anything, including what we talked about to ourselves? To think you blurt it out without considering the consequences. How are we suppose to trust you from now on?

2010-06-01T17:01:00.002+08:00

FML

Failed to get any crystals for my experiment today. What else is going to go wrong for me?

2010-06-01T02:15:00.001+08:00

I never fail to question my decision to take double major each semester when I get my results. Is it really a wrong step to take? Only time will tell.

2010-05-31T08:14:00.001+08:00

FML

1 B 4 B-

With this, my dilemma of whether to do honours or not is solved. I cant even if I want to.

2010-05-21T22:33:00.002+08:00

stand by me
look towards me
even though I don’t know love yet
stand by me
guard over me
because I am still clumsy at love

my feelings get better as I look at you
I find myself randomly singing
I even want to buy a single rose
The side of myself is so new
As my heart becomes closer to you
The world become more beautiful
If you feel my nervousness
Will you wait just a little bit?

Forever making love
Forever making you smile
Filled with your bright smile
Forever making love
Forever making you smile
Now hold my hands
Stand by me
Look towards me
Even though I don’t know love yet
Stand by me guard over me
Because I am still clumsy at love

The more I get to know you, my heart quivers
All I can do is smile
Shall I try to kiss you?
Will it get me a little closer to your heart?
Could this feeling be love
Im still shy
I haven’t even taken a single step to you
So please wait for my love

together making love
Forever making you smile
Filled with your bright smile
Together making love
forever making you smile
I will slowly heat towards you step by step
Stand by me
Look at me
Somehow, I want to be closer to you
Stand by me
Guard over me
I want to seem a bit cooler to you

I don’t know at first
How to begin to love
I still don’t know my heart
But I love you

together making love
Forever making you smile
Filled with your bright smile
Together making love
forever making you smile
now hold my hands
Stand by me
Look towards me
Even though I don’t know love yet
Stand by me guard over me
Because I am still clumsy at love

2010-05-20T21:03:00.003+08:00

When I read my last post, I realised how disjointed the ideas are. Im just wording random thoughts together. And it really displayed how tired we all were. Just to reinforced that point, I had a undisturbed 13 hours sleep last night. It was really satisfying to have uninterrupted sleep, especially since Im suffering from partial insomnia.

2010-05-19T00:19:00.002+08:00

Past couple of days whizzed by in a frenzy of shuffling between home, lab, the Science clubroom and the field. It was definitely tiring as we tried out games for the actual SOW camp. While most of the games are innovative and fun, they must be improved on the points awarding system, the time allocation as well as the logistics required. It was a novel experience for me to be filmed, since we had to do a video introduction of the characters we have to roleplay in accordance to the storyline the program comm had churned out. Camera shy as I always am, my mind blanked out and I froze when its my turn.

Today was a blast. Heavens have no mercy on us as it poured in the midst of us trying the wet and dirty games. What may turn out to be a wet blanket became the opposite. Since we were already dirty, we were like "why not?" and we allowed ourselves to be drenched in the torrential rain. The aftermath was not difficult to guess. A bunch of shivering and soaked to the skin people walking back to science under the curious gaze of the NUS staff. Video taking was on later and it ended just a little while ago. It would be the finale tomorrow and would conclude at Sentosa. While exhausted, no one seems to be in the mood to sleep, as they engage in one of the comm's favourite pastime - HTHT.

Anyways, I have plenty of admiration for this committee. To bring together 26 people and have them work together is no easy feat. And to have them bond to this extent, is something worth labeling as an achievement. To my knowledge as of now, there arent any bad blood within the committee and every meeting is filled with laughter.

2010-05-16T17:14:00.001+08:00

A reinvigorating session of basketball with two of my secondary school buddies - Alex and Kejun. Too bad the sun was out to kill us and most of us "died" after the first match. And it seems May is just not my month - I got injured again.

And Level 3000 experiments totally suck. There's hardly any journals out there that I can refer to. Been at it the whole day and I've hardly made any progress.

2010-05-13T01:26:00.001+08:00

The torture of enduring two days with less than 3 hours of sleep was paid off with a superb delivery of program activities and games without much hassle. Although several minor difficulties surfaced during the process, comm members were flexible and took the initiative to solve them. And to be honest, I was amazed at how smooth the transitions from each activities took and the time we were ahead of schedule. It was almost inevitable that comparisons were made with previous senior gatherings and the MCs were quite impressed with our performance.

Im enjoying the time here with the committee, the camaraderie, how Im able to engage in HTHT sessions without much reservation. And I hope we will be able to put off another better, if not, similar performance for prep and the actual SOW camp, and the friendships forged will stay with me for a long time.

2010-05-10T21:26:00.003+08:00

First lab session of CM 3291 was jinxed. Picture speaks a thousand words. A potent concoction of benzaldehye, pyrrole and propanoic acid did that to my pinkie. To make matter worse, my first reaction mixture didnt yield me any crystal product and I have to repeat the experiment. Most of my apparatus were also faulty, some leaky while some unable to function.

2010-05-07T01:43:00.001+08:00

My ego will be my pitfall

2010-04-25T22:44:00.003+08:00

Was browsing through my org mid terms and I realized how much of a fool I am. I have no idea what was going through my mind at that point of time. It was not that difficult after all. Nevertheless, a last chance to redeem my mediocre grades - finals tomorrow. And a paper a day for the next consecutive 4 days before a final paper on 6th May. After which I all geared for holidays. Sad to say I still have special sem which jeopardize my chances at double major if I dont do it but nonetheless there's SOW! Woo!

2010-04-23T21:39:00.001+08:00

Gearing up for exams with lots of smilies for encouragement :)

2010-04-20T13:47:00.003+08:00

If you ever played DOTA you'll understand this statement. "Organic Chem is just like a Centaur Chieftain with lvl 4 Return and armed with 6 blade mails" - Melvis

I dont know if this applies to anyone else but the more I study it the more confused I become. It is on a total different class of difficulty. To summarise, you have to consider which functional group will react, what reagents to use and finally how your product will turn out to be (stereochemistry) which requires a certain degree of visualisation. To think that it was my favourite topic during JC.

Before the any FoE students challenge me with that statement, to clarify, I meant within the chemistry modules only. When I looked at the questions, my mind just went blank, as though I've never studied it at all.

2010-04-19T18:38:00.004+08:00

So the issue (refer to 2 posts earlier) was brought up to the professor and it has escalated into a big hoo-ha. One was remorseful, she understands that she has not put in much effort into the report and presentation. However, the other was more troublesome. She has the audacity to claim that she did put in equal amount of effort into the report!

To be honest, she did contribute some ideas, none of which we used because they were deemed not feasible at all. I recognize her effort to try to do something, but to equate the amount of work she did to what we did would be too much. Besides, none of her words went into the report!

This is exactly why I hesitated to bring the issue to the prof's notice initially. It not only sours relationship/friendship, but also more trouble when they choose to rebut your opinion. The things people are capable of doing when they are drived up the wall are amazing.

2010-04-15T14:03:00.002+08:00

Really in some deep shit now. 25/100 for org test. Think that's a F?

2010-04-14T17:33:00.001+08:00

Lugging the Clayden organic chemistry textbook around in school has become my exercise for the week. Its so heavy its giving my arms a good workout.

2010-04-13T19:00:00.003+08:00

Presentation was a disaster as I predicted. Oh well, I guess Im not born to talk in front of an audience but I was really awed by some of my classmate. No script and they present as though they were conversing which made me appear like a total noob. Cant expect any lesser, NUS business school is one of the top business school in asia as they marketed themselves to be. Im wondering if Im able to do it for all my other 3 level 3000 biz modules.

Not only that, I think Im screwed big time. Report was almost in the wrong direction and there's only 3 days to revise it. I dont know I should identify the two slackers who didnt contribute a single word to the report as the main culprits but I thought it was rather irresponsible to dump it on the other members and claim that you have other commitments to fulfill. Who doesnt? I've already sacrificed many hours of revision for my darned up organic chem to do this report. This is not the first time I have experienced this and to be honest Im getting sick and tired of getting such group members for projects. Any comments are appreciated.

2010-04-08T06:51:00.003+08:00

Stress level is at a all time high. I've tried to go to sleep for at least three times but it was all in vain. Two tests later and a presentation next tuesday which Im incredible worried about.

2010-04-05T20:40:00.002+08:00

Preparations for intensive mugging sessions: 12 bottles of Brand's Chicken Essence, courtesy of my parents. Not limited to 12 bottles only, I suppose.