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Sunday, October 28, 2007, 6:00 PM
I wont be able to make this entry tomorrow, so Im writing this now.Tomorrow is a special day, a significant milestone in my NS stint. It is a day when I will only have 99 days to ORD, a nice 2 digits compared to the usual daunting 3 digits. This may seem minor and inadequate to be even classified as a milestone, but to me, this is a pleasant piece of news. Especially when you are in a shit hole. And the recent chain of events have prompt me to wonder if Im indeed doing too much for a NSF, as mentioned by my platoon sergeant. In fact, I never had the intention to do all those saikang. These chores were merely directed to me by a incompetent bunch of blockheads who we fondly call commanders. Sorry to make a dig at them but I simply couldnt resist the urge. So, why am I even bothering? Chee, if you're reading this, here's my rationale. Im not doing all those because of any selfish reason. What do I stand to gain by messing up the store? Its all just me, my personality, my silent way of releasing all those pent-up frustrations and stress. When someone puts me in charge of something, my personality tells me to put in my 100% effort, whether I like it or not. You see, Im a perfectionist, I cant tolerate blemishes. That the reason, simple as that. And I have really given serious thoughts about PS' comment. Which is why I have now decided to let everything go. Im not going to give a damn about anything. Rest assure what happened last thursday night would never occur again. 100 days to ORD Saturday, October 27, 2007, 11:44 PM
I never believed in karma until that eventful friday afternoon.Recall the previous incident that made me blew my top, the one which the commander had his meal and proceeded to rest while his platoon worked for him? Well, he got his just deserts. He was at the receiving end of what I went through. And finally, the day I prophesize has arrived, the day when the culmination of dispute finally reaches its threshold, the day when the platoon would stage a mutiny. Scary but true. It is ironical how the same people commented this would be the type of commander they desire would be among those who initiated. This is the consequence when the platoon deem the commander unworthy of leading them. I have long expected this inevitable day the moment I saw how he managed the platoon, his leadership capabilities, the lack of actually, and his mannerisms. To effectively lead a platoon crammed with competent ex-students with numerous distinctions in the A levels, each with their own unique thinking and expectations would be no easy feat. Not that I want to boast, but signal platoon consists of the most number of 3As and 4As in the whole battalion. A commander can be your friend, and the vice versa is true. However, in order to command the respect of the platoon, one has to differentiate that subtle difference. He would need to know when to exert his authority and when to engage in soul-soul conversation. This is imperative, especially in this platoon. Too much pressure will result in a backlash. Too little and they'll walk over you. Sorry about the random rambling. Just had to get this off my chest. 100 days to ORD 12:33 AM
Leave me Alone 12:05 AM
Silence.Utter Silence.. Dead Silence... I will not speak unless I absolutely find the need to. I will not work unless there are specific orders. I will be apathetic. From now on, I shall assume a new self assigned role. I shan't divulge the job scope of this role. My threshold for the tolerance of the platoon has just been broken. I am exhausted. I am frustrated. I am discouraged. The world, or rather my world just fell apart, crumble into pieces, leaving no exidences of its existence. I am a psycho. I display Jekyll and Hyde tendencies. Someone refer me to a psychologist before I turn crazy. 102 days to ORD Monday, October 22, 2007, 7:31 PM
Woah! 2 consecutive posts in a day? Something must be wrong!Har! There's nothing wrong. I just felt inspired to write something. One of my fellow platoon mate created a blog and 'pow', I was overwhelmed by his bombastic vocabulary and superior writing techniques. He made each entry seem like a mini essay. In fact the way Im writing appears to be that of a elementary school student when compared to his. Yes, Im envious and at the same time jealous. I'll just have to write and read more to improve. Watch out everyone =P Booking in, a detestable procedure I have to endure for about 15 weeks more. Bahh.....(*&$)&_)(*)%* 106 days to ORD 1:48 PM
The platoon seems constantly plagued by issues which small argument escalates into tumultuous brawls. The situation is further aggravated by several decisions the battalion made which, when you give thought to, had no sense whatsoever. It occurs to me that the battalion wishes to see us suffer as our ORD draws closer, or its a 'reward' for our exceptional result we accomplish for ATEC stage 1. It appears our efforts have gone down the drain. We certainly deserve more than what we are getting now.Given the circumstances now, the thought of booking in has never been so reprehensible before. 106 days to ORD Sunday, October 14, 2007, 9:31 PM
12k today. Cant seem to have a decent run without any problem. The skin from my right toenail tore, perhaps from the vigorous friction between the socks and the shoe itself. No idea how long it'll take to recover =X114 days to ORD Saturday, October 13, 2007, 9:27 PM
Planned to run 12k today but I have to forsake that idea. Instead I had to be contented with just 6k. This isnt good. Marathon's coming up in less than 2 months. But I wasnt in the best shape to run after like 2 weeks of flu, with phelgm still stuck on your throat. Sigh... I guess I have to try again tomorrow.Putting the atrocious incident aside, its a remarkable achievement that our platoon attained the reputable REDCON 1 in the recent ATEC stage 1 which concluded last monday. In fact, we got a high score of 96%, better than the army average by 10% or so. Even so, this unit isnt thankful at all. They dont seem to appreciate what signals can contribute to the accomplishment of the mission. Never mind I shouldnt be bothered by this. I had this sweet dream a few days ago. Heh it kept me smiling for a whole day. =) I shan't reveal it, its something personal =D. 115 days to ORD Thursday, October 11, 2007, 10:21 AM
We are the unwilling,Led by the unworthy, To do the unnecessary, For the ungrateful. I found these four phrases very apt in describing our sentiments towards the army. Noticed I bolded the word 'unworthy'? Very suitable to define certain commanders. People from my platoon should know who Im referring to. My PC implemented this system of allowing several people to take charge of certain issue such as the signal store, vehicles and such. It appears to be a marvelous idea at first, at least to me. Certain cables and signal accessories that were easily lost before were now accountable. As time passes by, there seem to be a loophole in the system. Where is the commander in this picture? Why is the commander, who holds a higher allowance and receive better recognition, delegating ALL the work to the men? WHY? There was this particular incident that really pissed me off. We received instructions to return the radio stores after our ATEC evaluation on Monday. As usual, part of the platoon went with us. The others? The commander? Had their lunch, after which proceed to wash up and rest while the rest are STILL WORKING. Is this fair to those working? Worse still, when we came back we discovered our lunch were missing. SO THIS IS WHAT THOSE PEOPLE WHO WORKED FOR THE COMMANDER GETS HUH?! Why am I working for a commander who doesnt deserve my efforts? WHY? Thats the last straw. Im adding him to my own personal list of hopeless people who are beyond redemption. They receive total ignorance from me. Any of their actions are condemned. They want the extreme? I'll give it to them. 117 days to ORD Friday, October 05, 2007, 11:40 PM
I must be one of the world's worst procrastinator ever. Okay maybe that was exaggerated but at the rate at which Im delaying my training for the marathon, I'll be in no shape to complete even half of it. But I promise, once this freaking ATEC stage 1 gets out of the way, I'll be going all out to prepare myself.Monday will be the day everyone is slogging their guts out for. I would say it is the first part of test which defines our 2 years. Yea its ATEC stage 1. All the training we have been going through since day 1 of our enlistment is just for this. There is new tenant in my house who displaced my position in the living room, took over the control of the television. In fact, she is making me feel uncomfortable. She's like integrated herself into the family. She switches on the TV as and when she likes, switch channels without asking. And I have this suspicion that she damaged one of my masterpiece which I painstakingly took 3 days to complete. Grrr... why should I put up with all this just for that measly amount of rent each month? Its a total invasion of privacy. The idea of going home now puts me off, I rather stay outside. 2100. Time to book in by tonight. Spending a Saturday night and the whole Sunday in camp sucks. Just because they want the result for ATEC. Why should we care? Our career isnt in the army. Whether we do this good or not does not have a impact on our future. What more there's only 4 more months to ORD. I have lost all enthusiasm to work already. 122 days to ORD |